Today is a “mom guilt” type of day. Every mother knows exactly what I’m talking about. It usually happens at the end of a long and trialing day after she puts the kids to bed. The silence kicks in, almost annoyingly. As a mom, some days feel like you are literally living for the end of the day, when you can have some peace and quiet. Ironically, THAT is when the “mom guilt” rears her ugly face. She begins beating herself up for all of the ways she should have reacted or all of the things she wishes she did differently. She thinks about all the opportunities she missed in that single day to take a breath and just enjoy her children. She feels badly that she didn’t get to do all those crafty Pinterest activities that every other mom in her Facebook/Instagram feed seems to have accomplished with her children.
For a normal mother, these guilt pangs last a few hours before bed. She makes self promises that tomorrow is another day and will be a better day. She sleeps and then the next day presents itself.
For a mother who has to send her children to their father’s for the weekend, these pangs radiate for nearly 72 hours. I sit here and set all of these unrealistic goals for the upcoming week. I find things on Pinterest that I will never have time to do. I actually just caught myself considering playing hooky from school and taking them someplace fantastic for the day. Divorced kids always get to do all of the fun things with their fathers and sometimes I get these feelings of jealousy.
We, as mothers, have a tough job. It doesn’t come with a paycheck at the end of the day or week. It doesn’t come with a guide and how could it? Each child is like night and day. “Mom guilt” is a wicked little trick your mind likes to play on you. At the end of the day, if your children are happy, kissed goodnight, and reciprocate the “I love you’s” at bedtime, it can’t be that bad, right? You and I will never be Super Mom. We will never be perfect. We will never be Carol Brady. With so many social outlets in our faces constantly, it’s hard not to compare and critique ourselves. The point is, there is no instant gratification in the world of motherhood. We all hope to have these conversations with our future children 20 years down the road about what they used to do and laugh about it. That’s the thing about being a mom…each day is just a part of what you are helping mold your children into. Don’t feel guilty about something that isn’t even finished.